Archives for February 2018

3 Essential Questions Coaches Need to Ask Often (And 2 Activities to Do as a Team)

And 2 Activities to Do with Your Team or Staff

5 Minute Read or Listen on iTunes

Activity 1: The Spaghetti and Marshmallow Tower Task

Simple and fun experiment to do with your team or coaching staff.

Break everyone into small groups and distribute:

20 pieces of spaghetti per group
20 small marshmallows per group
1 large marshmallow per group
1 foot of tape per group
1 piece of paper

The objective of the project is simple. Each group needs to construct a tower that will support one large marshmallow at the top. The group that builds the highest free-standing tower wins the competition.

The Research

“Safety is the foundation on which strong culture is built.” -Daniel Coyle

Who would win If you were to give this task to two groups?

1) A group of business school students

2) A group of kindergartners

Some researchers actually did this experiment and studied the groups.

After close study they observed the business students to be professional, asking intelligent questions and generating different ideas and options.

The kindergartners barely spoke to each other, but when they did they spoke quickly. They were without a plan or strategy and appeared to just be trying a bunch of stuff out.

So obviously the business school students win this every time right?

Wrong.

Kindergartners averaged 26 inches tall and business school students averaged 9 inches tall.

In fact when the experiment was performed in other trials, kindergartners repeatedly score higher than groups of business students, lawyers, and CEOs!

How is this possible?

Safety.

Business school students are focused on “status management”, worried about criticizing others, and focused on trying to find out where they fall in the group. They are not focused on the task, but on managing their status.

Kindergartners are willing to try new things, they are not competing with each other, and have great energy at the task. They work together in a smarter way, because they feel safe to do so.

Do you have a safe culture or one focused on status management?

Toyota, who has been the world leader in car making for sometime, has a culture of continuous improvement, “kaizen” , where anybody can stop production if they spot a problem. When things go wrong, people are not afraid to ask “why?”, and explore every solution.

Whether we are talking about a coaching staff, sports team, or business we need to reflect if we have a culture that people feel safe to question ANY problem they see. For a long time I thought people felt “safe” within my own team to speak up, but on reflection of my experiences, this was not always the case.

In fact, research shows 75% of people will give an obviously wrong answer to conform to a group’s preference! It is incredibly hard to build a culture where people feel safe to challenge the status quo, because people are naturally inclined to be focused on “status management”, even some of the best leaders and brightest minds!

So how do you create a safe culture focused on continuous improvement?

It starts with leaders being wiling to share their struggles and the problems they are facing.

It is never to late to start building that culture.

Many teams are near the end of their season and some are already done.

Regardless of the stage of your season the following activity is great and I think some version could be done on a weekly basis!

Team/ Staff Activity

Get some notecards. One for every person.
Everyone write down one problem on the front of the card.
People pass around the cards and everyone writes down their solution to the problem.
The leader will then read through each card with the team/ staff and they will discuss the problem and proposed solutions.

How can we do this better?

“A culture of asking and re-asking fundamental questions cuts away unhelpful beliefs in order to achieve clarity of execution. Humility allows us to ask a simple question: how can we do this better?” -James Kerr

Every solution should answer one of the following three core questions!

What is something I or we need to start doing?
What is something I or we need to stop doing?
What is something I or we need to keep doing?

Some weeks leave it open as to the subject area of the problem.

Other weeks pick an area for people to bring up even the “smallest” of problems they observe.

Some suggestions of areas to investigate are:

Player roles
Playing time
Defensive Strategy
Offensive Strategy
Timeouts, Half-time Talks
Scouting Report
Film Sessions
Warm-Up
Team Meals and Nutrition
Coaching Behaviors During Game, Practice, and Off the Court
Player Behaviors During Game, Practice, and Off the Court
Referees

People often get caught up in debating the big decisions and as coaches we spend a lot of time focusing on strategy, the teaching points of a skill, or who will start in the next game.

But we need to be more focused on what we are willing and able to DO and NOT DO after we have made that decision.

Stay focused on the 1% gains.

The solutions do not need to be big sweeping changes, in fact small changes are most actionable.

Some examples of some simple solutions for coaches I have worked with have been:

Clearly defining where everyone should stand during a time-out so players feel close and engaged.
Removing a drill from the warm-up that coaches and players do not believe is beneficial.
Cutting the time down for a coach to present a scouting report.
All of your coaching staff taking the initiative to say an honest thank you to the referee(s) before the game.
The head coach building stronger relationships by spending 2 minutes before each practice to talk with players about something other than their sport.

Call to Action

Whether you do any of these activities or not you need to find ways to invite input. Daniel Coyle in The Culture Code makes these three points.

It is really hard for people to raise their hand and bring up something controversial or challenging.
It is just as hard for people to answer a genuine question from a leader asking for their opinion or help.
When your players or assistants give you “tough feedback” you need to not only listen, but embrace it! Even if you do not end up agreeing, they need to feel safe enough to tell you the truth the next time they see an issue.

-J.P. Nerbun

An Open Letter to Parents Who Find Their Own Value in Their Child’s Achievements

4 Minute Read or Listen on iTunes

I am writing this, not as a disgruntled coach tired of the “pain-in-the-butt” parents, but as a person who has witnessed a generation of young people who are struggling to not only find joy and fulfillment in their sport, but also to feel they are worthy of their parents’ love. I have witnessed the tears, the meltdowns, and the growing anxiety and depression in sports. I sense and know so many well intentioned parents who are getting lost in their child’s sporting experience.

Dear Parent,

who posts their child’s box score after every game on social media;
who set up a separate camera so that they can film their child’s every move in the game;
who creates highlight reels of their child’s performance to share on social media;
who proudly walks around talking about the number of “offers” their child has received from various colleges;
who believes getting an athletic scholarship is “making it”;
who goes on high school sports forums to bash other players and teams;
who contacts the coach when their child’s name is spelled wrong or their points are off in the newspaper box score;
who cries when their child is benched for not being a good teammate;
who blames the coach for their child’s poor statistics and failure to make the all-star team;
who literally cries after the game because their child doesn’t get playing time;
who are kept up at night after their child’s team is crushed by the opponent;
who yell, punish, and become “disappointed” in their child after performing poorly in the game;
who sits in the stands and only cheers when their child is in the game;
who waits outside the locker room to criticize their child’s performance;
who encourages their child to look out for themselves and “get theirs”;
who lectures their child on the car ride home;

I write this to the parents who are unwilling to let their child struggle and overcome challenges. You are robbing them of their greatest opportunities to grow as a person, and to develop the work ethic, grit, and resourcefulness that are necessary to succeed.

I write this to the parent whom, whether they realize it or not, finds their value and self-worth in their child’s sporting accomplishments. You need to know that your value and self-worth should not come from what your child does. It must come from who you are as a person.

As a coach, I have seen far too many instances where it is the parent who is most upset by a big loss, lack of playing time, or their child’s poor performance.

One of the greatest obstacles to a child’s success and enjoyment in sports is the belief that their value and self-worth must come from their performance and achievements, instead of who they are as a person. When you praise achievement, performance, awards, and accolades, you promote a fixed mindset, you create unhealthy pressure, and you “push them towards performance-based identity prisons” (Joshua Medcalf and Jamie Gilbert, Transformational Leadership).

Let me tell you about that prison.

In my case it was my coach who helped build the prison, not my parents.

I knew it all too well as a teenage boy.

It is this dark place where you feel you must continuously do more and achieve more if you want to be worthy of love.

In this place, we believe we are not enough.

Nothing feels like enough, and it never is enough, because there is always more that we can achieve.

We can score more points, win more trophies, and receive more scholarships.

I know this is not what you want for your child.

I know this is not what you are trying to do.

Yet, this is the reality of so many parent-athlete relationships.

The Healthy Way

Praise your children for their effort in a world that values taking the easy way out.

Praise your children for their positive attitude in a culture of negativity.

Praise your children for their resilience in the face of adversity.

Praise your children for their empathy, selflessness, and caring in a sporting culture that values “me first” and has a win-at-all-costs attitude.

But even more than any of that, love and be proud of your children, just for being your children.

Because they shouldn’t need to do anything to earn that love.

-J.P. Nerbun

3 Strategies to Move from a Coach-Led Team to a Player-Led Team

How a Sled Dog Team Works

Sled Dog teams have been around since 1000 BC and are still used today; not just for racing, but in the place of snowmobiles and helicopters for rescue operations. They are even able to travel for 6-8 hours across the roughest arctic conditions in the Iditarod Dog Sled Race.

Typically, the sled dog team ranges from 12-16 dogs, each with a very specific role and sequence. Each team has 2 lead dogs, 2 swing dogs, 6 team dogs, and 2 wheel dogs.

The lead dogs are critical to the function of the team, as they set the pace, keep the other dogs in sync, and take verbal direction from the musher. They are highly intelligent dogs that use their sense of smell and their sense of touch to detect danger and stay on snow-covered paths, respectively.

The swing dogs are critical to the remaining team members, as they help the lead dogs form a nice arc on the turns.

The team dogs are the muscle, with the most pulling power.

The wheel dogs are next to the sled. They are some of the heaviest dogs, and can withstand the force of the starting and stopping of sled. Sometimes, dog positions are switched during the race, because some dogs make better leaders in different weather and terrain conditions.

What you might call the driver is actually the musher. Mushers are known for their ability to battle harsh conditions by being incredibly resourceful and handy, sometimes having to wait out a storm, repair the sled, and even fight off wild animals. They have a reputation for building strong connections with their dogs by putting the health of their dogs first, even to go as far as feeding them before they feed themselves, and making sure they each have a warm bed.

What Sled Dogs Can Teach Sports Teams

“Leaders create leaders by passing on responsibility, creating ownership, accountability, and trust.”

–James Kerr in Legacy

A sled dog team provides many great lessons for us ins sports with similarities in roles and function. Great captains operate like lead dogs, out front, on the look for trouble, and keeping the team on the path. Every team has their team dogs who follow more than they the lead. And on great teams, you do need a few wheel dogs, the players who show up for the everyday grind without the promise of any spotlight or playing time. Obviously, a great coach is like the musher, building strong relationships with their team and putting the team’s well-being above their own!

But who is leading the team? Well when it comes to the Alaskan Iditarod Trail Sled Dog Race, the biggest competition in the world, the strongest teams are often defined by the strength of the top lead dogs. Great lead dogs are a product of great training, and trust between them and their musher.

The musher does not steer his team like many would imagine. Instead he gives guidance and listens to his lead dogs, because they have been trained to be out front feeling and smelling, using their senses to understand the terrain and keep the team on the path. It is the responsibility of the musher to know the big picture of where they are headed, but it is the lead dogs and swing dogs that keep them on the path.

If you study two of the most successful sporting teams in the world – UNC Women’s Soccer and The New Zealand All-Blacks Rugby team – you will be able to see some strong similarities between them and the musher. They train their players to become leaders, and there is a transfer of responsibility over the course of a season.

Empower Your Players to Lead

“In four years, all of our players are basically ready to coach, because they not only understand the game, they have an understanding of how to verbally explain the game.”

–Anson Dorrance in Training Soccer Champions

Dorrance is one of the most successful sports coaches of all time with 21 National Championships. He believes in teaching his women to understand the game, but to coach it. He trains and equips them to get out and lead, not just follow!

As outrageous as it may seem to some, on a weekly basis, The New Zealand All-Blacks Rugby team hands over the coaching responsibilities to the players, author James Kerr describes this process in his book Legacy,

“The structure of the working week epitomizes this management model: the Sunday evening review meetings are facilitated by the coaches, though significant input comes from the on-field leadership. Then, over the course of the week, you see a gradual handing over of responsibility and decision-making. By Thursday, the priorities, intensity levels, and other aspects are all ‘owned’ by the players. By the time they play on Saturday, the players have taken over the asylum. ‘I’m just a resource,’ says Henry [The Head Coach].”

But why would we, as coaches, pass on the leadership responsibility? Kevin Roberts, CEO of Saatchi & Saatchi, one the world’s top creative organizations, says, “A team of ‘followers’ is immediately on the back foot. A team of leaders steps up and finds a way to win.”

3 Strategies to Move from a Coach-Led Team to a Player-Led Team

1. Ask great questions.

Dorrance, like many other great coaches, believes in the Socratic method of teaching. Instead of standing up, lecturing the team about strategy, and telling them what to do, you can instead engage them with strong questions, and instill the possibility that they will be called upon to answer the question. For example, if you are a soccer coach, then instead of telling Mia or the team where she should be positioned in a certain situation, ask the team where they think she should be positioned. After you ask the question, call on Mia or one of her teammates. Now, instead of just telling Mia, you have taught Mia and the team by allowing everyone to think about the question and come up with the correct answer.

2. Let them go first.

Whether it is before a game, at half-time, after a game is over, during scouting reports, and in the film room, remember that you do not always have to be the first person to speak! Let your team offer their thoughts and analysis. Just like the lead dogs on a sled dog team, they are the ones out front seeing, feeling, and smelling what is going on!

3. Let them lead.

Let them run a drill, a practice, or a film session. You, like the All-Blacks Coach Graham Henry, are still coaching when you are acting as a resource for them to help guide the team by seeing the big picture. On the sled dog team, it is up to the lead dogs to keep the others on the path ahead. The musher is not constantly talking them through every turn! A player’s perspective and perception, while not always right, is incredibly important to listen to and understand.

Empowering > Overpowering

“I can’t play the game for you!”

I have said this line before, and I know that other coaches have said it as well! The truth is that not only can we not play the game for them, we shouldn’t even want to. Still, I see coaches over-coaching so much that I think if they could throw on a jersey, they would. We need to accept our role, and accept the truth that to be a great leader, we must give control to the people we are leading.